No Debbie Downers Here. 6 Upbeat Thanksgiving Ice-Breakers

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Many agents are struggling to find some positive things to say about the industry, the market, and even just the general vibe of the American experience after a very long summer and exhausting presidential election. Never fear, and no need to be a Debbie Downer.

Here are six things to discuss at dinner that will keep things light and bright and three things to steer clear of that might take you down the dreaded interrogation from Uncle Bob, who never used an agent — EVER — and is skeptical about what you even do for a living.

For the love of Bob, Aunt Bea and all the others who might throw you off your game, come to dinner prepared with these talking points.

6 topics to keep it sweet

1. Home design “core” trends: Share the latest trends in home decor, such as open floor plans or the return of vintage styles. Is it cottagecore? Costal grandma? How about Barbiecore? One of the things that is really fun about this is to talk about wacky trends and even talk about future “dream renovations” that you would love to do one day and their potential to increase home equity.
2. Funny house-hunting stories: Share amusing anecdotes you’ve encountered while searching for homes, like peculiar listings or quirky property features. Chasing down the cat that accidentally escaped, a strange piece of art — these are all OK to share as long as you keep the involved parties anonymous.
3. Neighborhood comparisons: Discuss fun facts about different neighborhoods, like unique local businesses, parks or community events. This is really good to mention if someone asks about market conditions. Share a fun fact about a local neighborhood that is selling really well right now, and why you think it’s popular.
4. DIY home improvement projects: Talk about creative DIY projects you or someone you know has undertaken and the results. This is a great opportunity to grab your phone and show Uncle Bob the custom firepit and seating area that one of your clients did in their backyard. Check your camera roll; I guarantee a slice of pumpkin pie you have some great pictures to share that you have captured this year.
5. Different-sized homes: Explore the variety of homes available, from tiny houses to luxury mansions, and what makes each appealing. Tiny homes always make for an interesting topic, especially if you have loved ones who are considering downsizing. Luxury mansions are fun to talk about in the scope of reality TV examples.
6. Quirky sales: Mention interesting statistics or facts, like the most expensive home sold in your area or unique market trends. This is a great opportunity to share how much a home sold for that totally surprised you. Which home had the most offers this year? This is a great educational opportunity to show loved ones how the market is changing.

3 things to avoid like the canned cranberry sauce

Here are three topics a real estate agent should avoid discussing at Thanksgiving dinner to keep the atmosphere pleasant:

1. Market conditions: Avoid in-depth discussions about the ups and downs of the real estate market, as it might turn into a debate or create stress, especially for those who might be struggling with their own home situations. This is a fast way to start a Turkey showdown, so don’t do it. Steer clear. Red alert. It’s not worth it since many of your loved ones have misinformation.
2. Client confidentiality and nightmare transactions: Steer clear of discussing specific clients, their situations, finances or deals. Respect for privacy is crucial, and personal anecdotes should be kept general. If you live in a small rural town, this is especially important because your Aunt Bea knows everyone’s business, and it will not take her long at all to figure out who you are talking about.
3. Politics and regulations: Discussions about housing regulations, property taxes or political issues affecting real estate can be contentious. It’s best to keep the conversation light and free of these potentially divisive topics. This is where you choose your battle, friends. If someone says something horrifically offensive, it’s a really good time to get a headache or to have to leave early to let the dog out at home. It’s very rare that you can change any minds or hearts over the stuffing.

No one has a “perfect” holiday, but hopefully, you get a good plate and a good chuckle at the gathering. Loving people where they are at, even if you have differences, is one of the hardest things to learn and practice, and you are going to have good days and bad days.

No one should put up with verbal abuse at holiday gatherings, and if the gathering is especially toxic, there is no hard or fast rule that you have to go at all — or you can drop in and then promptly roll out.

Take care of yourselves; be a brilliant source of light and keep the discussions moving in a positive direction. That in itself is an art form and will keep the other Debbie Downers at the table distracted with your interesting real estate adventure stories.

Hold hands, give thanks and remember: If you can take that nap after the meal, go for it.

Build a strategy for the holidays that promotes calm, peaceful energy to take into the New Year.

Rachael Hite is a seasoned housing counselor and thought leader in the real estate industry, known for her extensive expertise across business news journalism, retirement housing, and affordable housing initiatives. Connect with Rachael on Instagram and Linkedin.