When it comes to romantic relationships, Anna Kendrick has been honest about having a toxic ex. However, she always had a hard time referring to it as an “abusive” situation.
“It didn’t follow the traditional pattern,” Kendrick, 39, said during an episode of the “Call Her Daddy” podcast released on Wednesday, October 23. “I was finding it really difficult to identify it and name it as abusive.”
Kendrick said the relationship lasted for seven years. She recalled an “overnight switch” with her past partner that “came out of absolutely nowhere.” Because there was “so much love and trust” for her ex, Kendrick felt like she was the problem.
“It was very, very difficult to actually go, ‘No, this, I think this is, I think this is him. I think, I think this is his stuff,’” she said. “I turned my life completely upside down trying to fix whatever was wrong with me.”
Kendrick has spoken publicly about her relationship in the past — never referring to her ex by name — but Wednesday’s podcast episode offered detailed insight into what she went through.
“This conversation is really complicated for me,” Kendrick admitted when asked to identify the signs she might have missed. “It’s hard for me because there are even times when I talk about my situation where, as I’m saying it, I will go, ‘Am I making that up? Am I making everything up?’”
From going to couples therapy to where her dating life stands now, keep scrolling for the biggest relationship revelations from Kendrick’s “Call Her Daddy” episode:
Starring in ‘Alice, Darling’
Anna Kendrick visits the IMDb Portrait Studio at SXSW 2023. Corey Nickols/Getty Images for IMDb
Kendrick recalled not telling her therapist or closest friends that she was starring in the 2022 movie, which follows the story of a woman trapped in an abusive relationship.
“I had just gotten out of a relationship that was extremely similar to the movie,” the actress shared during Wednesday’s episode. “I didn’t want anybody to tell me to not do it. I didn’t want to get talked out of it.”
Their Couples Therapist
The actress said she and her ex’s couples therapist “bought his stuff.”
“I always felt like I was trying to stay so calm in couples therapy because I was like, f—, in these sessions, he’s so able to kind of stay calm in a way that he does not do when we’re outside of therapy,” Kendrick recalled.
During one specific therapy session, Kendrick said she “lost my s—,” and was concerned about the aftermath. “I’m trying so hard to appease this person, they’re so f—ing awful,” she said. “So how bad is it gonna get now that I’ve yelled?” (“Weirdly, he was fine,” she later shared.)
Eventually, something “shifted” in the therapy sessions. Kendrick said her therapist has since “apologized” for what happened during her past relationship. “I think he realized what was going on toward the end,” she said.
Was He Putting on a Performance?
Anna Kendrick attends The Fourth Annual Academy Museum Gala at Academy Museum of Motion Pictures. Matt Winkelmeyer/WireImage
Kendrick thought she would be able to “smell the bulls—” regarding her ex.
“I didn’t expect how totally convinced he was of his own victimhood,” she said, noting that she still doesn’t think her ex was “putting on a performance” during their relationship.
“I think he genuinely believed that I was like, torturing him,” she said.
‘Terrorizing’ Her Ex
Kendrick said that her ex once accused her of “terrorizing” him.
“I was just crying, because I couldn’t pretend that things were fine anymore,” she recalled. “I just started crying and he screamed in my face, ‘You’re terrorizing me.’ But it was truly from the place of a person who believed that they were being terrorized.”
A low-key kind of love. Anna Kendrick has remained relatively private when it comes to her dating history — but she’s been linked to some A-list stars. The Twilight actress’ personal life began to make headlines in 2009 when she sparked a romance with Scott Pilgrim vs. The World director Edgar Wright. After four years […]
The actress said that the feelings were “so real” to her ex that she was “convinced” that she was “doing something terrible.”
Feelings of Shame
Anna Kendrick attends Netflix’s “Woman Of The Hour” Los Angeles Premiere. Tommaso Boddi/Getty Images for Netflix
Kendrick’s advice for listeners in a similar situation is to “take off that top layer of shame” after getting out of a toxic relationship. She admitted, however, that sometimes it’s not that easy.
“I did and still sometimes do so much self-shaming,” she said. “How did I find myself in that situation? Like, I’m a real ass—-.”
Kendrick’s Relationship Status Now
The Twilight alum confirmed she is single — and she now has one non-negotiable when it comes to romantic partners.
“I’m never getting involved with a man — meaning we’re not even kissing, we’re not even going to have a real conversation — unless you are in or have been in therapy,” she said.
If you or someone you know are experiencing domestic violence, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 for confidential support.
